IF I were a Boy.

I'm late to the party here - which isn't anything new. Fashionably late is my forte. As well as being so consumed by drinking my glass of wine that I forget that I have a party to go to.

Either way. I'm linking up with the macaroni and cheese loving, Erin, for my rendition of If I were a boy....

First things first - mad props to my girl Beyonce for coming up with this idea first. She has everything, Jay Z, great hair, awesome body - and she even comes up with great song ideas. Here's my virtual fist bump, B. It must be noted that every boyfriend I've ever had has called me B. Ever.

Without further ado, if I were a boy...

I'd dress like Ryan Gosling. Or Lebron James.


I'd tell all the girls they were beautiful. Every single one of them.

I'd smell their hair. Kiss their foreheads. Smack their butts. Anything to make them feel beautiful.



I'd hold babies and make all the girls swoon.

I'd watch football and basketball. And I'd take girls as my date.

I'd eat macaroni and cheese every day. And drink beer.

I'd surf.



I'd have long hair and a beard. And I'd wear cowboy boots and flannel shirts. and sing country music.

I'd go out with the boys but go home early to see her.

I'd burp. And take shots.

I'd give my girl a cute nickname.

And I'd keep a bottle of wine chilled for whenever I may bring a cute girl over.

I'd make her wait. I wouldn't text her just because I know she is sitting their willing her phone to buzz.

I wouldn't make fun of her blog - I'd pretend to get it. While watching the football game on mute.

I'd dance with her because God knows she doesn't have any dance moves. And I'd like for people to think we are fun.

I'd never get mad at her for spending too much money on a new dress. Or shoes. Or that top in a different color.

I'd be completely irrational in my love for all things UK. And if she wants Scratch at her wedding, well, I'd encourage her to get married at the court house. And take her sailing around the world with all that money we'd save. Ya know, I bet she is a sucker for traveling.

And I'd pay for her to go see all of her bloggy friends. Once a month.

There you have it, guys. Completely perfect ideas for what I'd do if I were a boy.

Oh, and ps, I'm guest posting for Samilicious today. You know you wanna read it.

Happy Friday,
B